Animal Lords of Pangaea – Planescape: I am the Mimir

Lords of Prehistory — Animal Lords of Pangaea

My name is Keldran (planar githzerai monk [he/him] / LN) and I’ve never been interested in animals, much less extinct ones. But after my latest misadventure I seem to have found myself a new passion. So, I was in a party of four sellswords. We were doing great in the Outlands, but one day we foolishly decided to sneak around the Well of Urd, perhaps ask the Norns for a quick prophecy or four. Turns out the old witches really didn’t fancy that—or perhaps we just took a wrong turn—and when we were passing through an arch of curiously tangled bushes, we found ourselves on a strange new plane, face-to-face with an enormous feathered beast.

The creature lunged, opening its toothed maw and squawking. That’s when we realised something dreadful—our fighter’s sword had turned into a pointy stick, our bard’s lute became a strange and crude tortoise shell instrument with only one string, and our wizard’s spellbook was a clay tablet with indentations. On that sodding plane—I later learned that Leir the Explorer had coined this place Pangaea—all of the fruits of civilisation regress to their most primitive states! Needless to say, our magic users were mauled in a matter of seconds. The prehistoric monstrosity was clearly unafraid of humans, but it hadn’t counted on one thing—the plane couldn’t take away my martial training. A sharp blow to its snout sent the beast (I later learned the Guvners have catalogued its ‘proper’ name as australovenator) running away in pain. Unfortunately, the fighter was badly injured by its claws, and didn’t survive our subsequent encounter with a giant monitor lizard.

So there I was, left alone and scared, barely surviving on rainwater and the berries and nuts I could gather. That portal from the Well turned out to be one-way. I was sure as Sigil I’d be in the dead-book by the end of the day. But when I sat upon a boulder to lament my situation, I didn’t even notice the strange young man who sidled up to me.

Tuatara Lord

Seyhrain Hatteria. Planar animal lord [he/him] N

Realm: Pangaea / Tuatara’s Range

The man was short and slender, with a big wide grin and a peculiar bald spot on the top of his head, that was otherwise decorated with wild hair. He wore an outfit of spikes and leather. Putting two and two together, I assumed that I was in the Beastlands (I was much too tired by that point to remember that the Beastlands doesn’t have day-night cycle). ‘Are you the Lizard Lord?’ I asked hesitantly.

Smiling, he answered: ‘Cutter, I’m no lizard. In fact, I used to be his nemesis, until he bested me in the shakista. I bear no ill will towards the sod though, it was fair and square. Tis’ a shame my kin, the beak-heads, were outmatched by his. We used to crawl and swim all ’round the Prime, but now our numbers are so whittled down. I try to be more active, keep myself in shape, but even I stay ‘ere on Tuatara Range nowadays.’

‘Indeed, the plane you’re on is a sort of dead-book for us animal lords. See, the species that are almost or fully extinct find their place here, and have their own Lords like livin’ ones do. That’s the problem with being immortal see—when all your kin die off it can get pretty lonely. Most of us are confined to Pangaea, so you don’t see them in ya place. But I’m the exception, mate, thanks to that Māori power Whiro. He’s not a nice berk all things told, but I suspect it’s courtesy of him my tuataras are still persevering on Prime. I’ve no clue if I could whisk you away to the Gray Waste, but I suppose you would prefer to return to the Outlands, right? Thought so. Pack up then cutter, we’re going on a trip’.

Moa Lord

Seyhrain Dinornis, Te Kura. Planar animal lord [she/her] N

Realm: Pangaea / The Moa Lord’s Island

The Tuatara Lord assumed his reptilian shape and climbed up onto my shoulders. We proceeded along the coastline, which was—judging by a multitude of sunbathing reptiles bowing in his presence—his domain. It was at that point I was approached by an enormous wingless bird. It was quite docile and seemingly thought I was one of its kind. But the Tuatara Lord urged me forward.

‘If I were ya, I wouldn’t touch any of those big-birds. They may like you, but their Lord, like many others, had not forgotten her grudge. Human-kin have put many of them here, and you look human enough. Dare I say, if you were a bird, you’d probably have much better time around her. This part of an island is the Moa Lord’s realm, and you’re quite lucky she hadn’t noticed your presence. We must float away.’

Ammonite Lord

Seyhrain Titanites. Planar animal lord [she/her] N

Realm: Pangaea / Wandering

Our ‘ship’ turned out to be a barely-floating jumble of sticks, moss and plant matter. I was hesitant to even step on it, but the Tuatara Lord assured me his subjects (that is, aquatic rhynchocephalians with long flat tails) would guide us safely. Soon, we’d made it out into the open sea. Curious, I peered down into the deep water, but then instantly pulled myself back, as I spied an enormous shadow passing by beneath.

‘I see you’ve already tumbled to the dark of things ’round here, cutter. Indeed, there’s plenty of predators in the Inner Sea of Pangaea, who’d swallow you without a second thought. But she’s the Ammonite Lord, and she ain’t one of them. She’s kinda the biggest lord around here, or at least until the Dinosaur Lord finally deigns to join us. Not that it’s better than being by the side of the Octopus Lord, but surely beats departing to the Ediacarian Realms beyond the sea. Folks on the Prime remember ammonite shells very well, which can be why even wayward powers sometimes visit the Ammonite Lord. She spends her days in this giant form, so that nobody disturbs her. Chant goes, the Ichthyosaurus Lord desperately wants to munch on old lady Ammonite, but his bite ain’t strong enough.’

I plunged my head into the water and could clearly make out a giant mollusc in a beautiful spiral shell, surrounded by many similar, but smaller creatures. But when a marine reptile with a head the size of my body suddenly rose from the murk of the deep and snatched a nearby ammonite, I wisely decided to abandon my underwater observations for the rest of the trip.

Temnospondylus Lord

Seyhrain Batrachosuchus. Planar animal lord [he/him] N

Realm: Pangaea / Swamp of Coals (contested)

After passing through an area described by the Tuatara Lord as the domain of eurypterids, which turned out to be frightening creatures that can best be described as a cross between a crab and a scorpion that grew to 8 feet, we entered a steaming swamp of tree ferns. The Tuatara Lord confessed that he had limited knowledge of this place. Apparently, this it’s known simply as the Swamp of Coals, and its contested ground between the Temnospondylus Lord of giant amphibians and the Coelacanth Lord of lobe-finned fishes—and those lords frequently kill each other. Temnospondylus is currently winning the jakishta and establishing their kingdom in the Swamp. I was traversing the mire by hopping between mangrove roots (fortunately, psionic abilities such as jump aren’t hindered in Pangaea), and spotted many temnospondyli of different shapes and sizes—but I’m almost ashamed to say that by that time those flat-headed rough-skinned salamander lookalikes didn’t seem all that impressive to me. But I wouldn’t want to get up close and personal with them nonetheless.

Azhdarcho Lord

Seyhrain Aerotitan. Planar animal lord [he/him] N

Realm: Pangaea / Wandering

At last, the dense swamp gave way to sparse coniferous forests. I was relieved to finally leave the intoxicating steamy fen, but the Tuatara Lord turned anxious. ‘Tread in the bushes, where underbrush is the thickest, cutter. We don’t have snakes in this time. Even better, the allosaurus can’t get to you here. But what’s most important, the Sky Sovereign can’t either. Look above and see his ilk.’

A giant winged creature soared way above my head. Long after my journey ended I learned that this was a hatzegopteryx, one of the biggest non-magical animals that ever flew. A nice juicy githzerai like me would fall right on its list of acceptable snacks. But it either failed to notice me, or decided I couldn’t be reached in such a dense forest. I proceeded through the underbrush, silently thanking the powers that I haven’t met any land predators on my way.

‘The Azhdarcho Lord still clings to his status. The blood used to be the most grandiose of the Lords of the Skies, gracing the Beastlands with his presence. But as time flew on, his wards dwindled in numbers, and eventually he left to make his kip here. The Azhdarcho Lord considers land-dwellers beneath his concerns (literally so), and he hates birds, whose Lord (oh is it already Lords? Hard to keep up with what happens on the Great Ring, not that I pretend to care) “stole” his sky. Chant goes that some Prime race who call themselves the pterafolk worships the Azhdarcho Lord along with other pterosaur Lords, but this doesn’t seem to help his cause.’

Sabretooth Lord

Seyhrain Smilodon. Planar animal lord [she/her] N

Realm: Pangaea / The Sabertooth Lord’s Cave

‘Here I must leave you, mate. The Glacial Steppes are way too cold for my old hide. Mammals rule here, just like on your planes, so you know what to do. Be especially peery for sabretooth cats. Their Lord remembers humans, she does. I can’t wager on what she can do to you—some say she likes hunting intelligent prey. She’s quicker than a quinkana and meaner than a megalania, so good luck outrunning her. You will have to locate Indrik—one of those Animal Lords, who got elevated to be a full-fledged power. He can give you a lift to the Beastlands or the Outlands, even if you have to get past his herd of rhinos first. Indrik is so tall he scratches the sky, so you won’t miss him. Anyway, nice been knowing you, mate!’

After uttering those words, the Tuatara Lord scampered away. I wished him Lady’s Grace and proceeded further, now much more terrified. I could swear I saw a woman in furs, surrounded by monstrous big cats, but then again, my imagination was running wild. Now I assume she’d decided that a githzerai would be way too weird of a target.When I reached Indrik, I was awestruck, no matter how tired I was. Fortunately, most of his herd struggled to keep up with his enormous steps. I climbed onto his hoof, got ahold of his fur and closed my eyes.

My return

I don’t know how exactly the plane shift happened, but when I opened my eyes, my gear was back, and the Spire was in sight. I couldn’t recognise the place, so I walked towards the Spire and within a couple of hours reached Sylvania. Turns out, Indrik had brought me to the Hinterlands. Or perhaps I was in the Hinterlands the whole time? The jury’s divided on that. But what is certain is my newfound passion for prehistory. This doesn’t mean I’m ever planning on stepping back through that portal mind, but maybe a party of barbarians and druids might have better luck.

There are plenty of questions left unanswered. Do all Animal Lords eventually end up in Pangaea? What are the ‘Ediacarian Realms’? Are they another plane or simply a location within Pangaea, where creatures so ancient that their very shape has been forgotten, reside? Can a species be resurrected, and what would happen to its Animal Lord if it were? Are extinct Animal Lords chained to Pangaea like the Titans to Carceri—or are they simply too afraid to leave and face their thriving competitors? Can an Animal Lord ever truly die? The Tuatara Lord did not give me answers to those questions—or many more, and I wasn’t interested in sticking around long enough to find the answers out for myself. But perhaps some other adventurers can?

Source: Margarita, based on an idea by Greg Jensen. Canonwatch: Everything here is homebrew (in the context of Planescape at least, all of these prehistoric creatures roamed the world once upon a time!)