I am the Very Model of a Modron Major General
A very modern modron major general tells us what it’s like to be a quarton. Audible glamer by Jon Winter-Holt, inspired by Overlordjunka. With apologies to all pirates who hail from the Penzance area.
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I am the Very Model of a Modron Major General
I am the very model of a Modron Major General,
With logic so impeccable and details categorical,
I calculate with certitude, my thoughts are computational,
In Mechanus I’m right at home, it’s really quite sensational!
I’m metric, polyhedral, and a little bit alchemical,
I’m very well acquainted too, with matters mathamagical
I’ve mastered incantation, both the cantrip and the ritual
I practice every morning till their use is quite habitual.
He’ll practice every morning till their use is quite habitual!
He’ll practice every morning till their use is quite habitual!
I know the planes that border from Arcadia to Acheron,
And I can name the rankings from great Primus to the decaton,
I work in syncopation with our hierarchy numerical,
Though sometimes existential thoughts might make me feel hysterical!
I’m proficient with the axioms of order and efficiency,
The cogs and gears of Mechanus, they give me self-sufficiency!
I calculate and contemplate all matters that are logical,
I doubt the practicality of all things biological!
He doubts the practicality of all things biological!
He doubts the practicality of all things biological!
I’ve catalogued the integers, the primes and even decimals,
All of my data organised with purpose most professional,
I’d love to be spontaneous, though frankly it’s quite difficult,
When random thoughts are flagged and filed away as antithetical!
My every move’s predictable, I march in nice parabolas,
With gears that tick precisely and in sequences so fabulous,
And though my work’s repetitive, I’ve learned to find it quite sublime,
For with a clockwork purpose, my life’s really quite the paradigm!
For with a clockwork purpose, his life’s really quite the paradigm!
For with a clockwork purpose, his life’s really quite the paradigm!
So when you meet a modron, take a moment, have some decency,
We’re built for form and function, not for things like spontaneity,
We modrons thrive in structured rows, with lives so categorical,
We’re gears and wheels and rigid rules, with purpose near perpetual,
Our lives are quite predictable, but highly intellectual!
That’s why I am the model of a modron Major General!
That’s why he is the model of a modron Major General!
That’s why he is the model of a modron Major General!
